


si vis amari, ama

by driftinglines



Category: Dead Poets Society (1989)
Genre: Actor Neil, Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, I mean it, M/M, Multi, Slow To Update, ace cameron, artist knox, aspec meeks, charlie is a bastard, enby charlie, gay todd, hes not a great brother tho, in the best way possible, it guy pitts, jeff is a character here, kind of, knox is baby, like very, linguistics cameron, musician charlie, pan pitts, physicist meeks, poet todd, poly knox, queer neil, stoner charlie, stoner everyone tbh, stoner knox, v sorry in advance, very slow
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-13
Updated: 2020-05-13
Packaged: 2021-03-02 20:21:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,332
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24162775
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/driftinglines/pseuds/driftinglines
Summary: it started with a frat party. it started with a lighter and two games of beer pong. it started so very innocently. todd had no idea it would ever come to this.or: the one where i try (and inevitably fail) to write a slow burn college au
Relationships: Charlie Dalton/Knox Overstreet/Chris Noel, Steven Meeks/Gerard Pitts, Todd Anderson/Neil Perry
Comments: 3
Kudos: 13





	si vis amari, ama

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> content warning: implied drug use (weed); drinking
> 
> fair warning: this was written over the span of 3 day, most of it at 2 am and frankly that is exactly what it is  
> enjoy!

"c'mon toddy, it'll be fun!" he had said.

  
todd rolled his eyes at the thought of his brother convincing him to go to one of his stupid frat parties. right now, all todd wanted was to go home but jeff was nowhere to be found, probably off somewhere with his college friends and so todd was left to his own devices, sipping his, frankly absolutely disgusting, beer and trying to avoid eye contact with anyone at all costs.  
in fact, he was so focused on keeping his head down, he only realised he was headed straight for the beer pong table when he ran right into one of the two guys setting up a new game.

"woah there!" the boy called out and a cold hand grabbed onto todd's to keep him from stumbling over.

"well someone's had a few to many." the other guy snickered and todd felt his cheeks heat up uncomfortably.

"cut it out, charlie!"

todd managed to look up at his crash victim (who was still holding his hand for some reason, why was he still holding his hand?!) and felt his heart rate accelerate even more. he was staring up into the biggest brownest eyes he had ever seen with dark brows furrowed into a worried frown. the guy looked like a sad baby deer, except for his mouth which was turned up into a cheeky smile.

"uh s-sorry." todd tried to produce his specialty - the forced, yet effortless chuckle - but all that left his throat was a nervous squeaking sound. the uncomfortable heat was now spreading from his cheeks to his stomach. "sorry. bye."

he all but ran for the door, only relaxing the tiniest bit when he stood on the porch of the frat house and got both his trusty lighter and a new pack of cigarettes out of his pockets.

barely 10 seconds after todd had lit his first cigarette of the night, the front door opened and another boy stepped into the night. he stopped for a second, rummaged through his coat pockets and sighed, before glancing over at todd.

"hey, sorry? have you got a lighter by any chance?"

"sure." todd watched patiently as the boy lit the cigarette between his lips and returned the lighter while taking the first drag.

"thanks. i'm knox, by the way. you're not from here, are you?"

todd smiled, more genuinely this time. "i go to college here but i'm only a freshman, so i'm not in any frat yet. i'm actually only here because of my brother."

knox was short, almost as short as todd, and his otherwise rather neat dirty blond hair was so long at one point in the front, it covered half of his left eye, from the inner corner of the eye to the pupil. todd could only hope that was a homemade hairstyle.

the two boys kept talking for several more minutes. knox revealed he was a freshman as well and, like todd, studied literature and art history and only attended the party because of one of his friends.

“they actually used to deal for most of the guys in this frat so now they get invited to pretty much every party.” he smiled sheepishly and brought a finger to his lips as if he was swearing todd to secrecy. “anyways, do you maybe wanna go back to my friends with me? they’re all freshmans as well and most of them are pretty cool actually.”

“uhm.. yeah, sure.” todd smiled nervously and followed knox as he led the way back into the house.

“great news, guys!” knox yelled “charlie doesn’t have to play alone anymore!”

charlie.

that name sounded familiar.

_oh shit._

before todd could say anything to save himself he was back at the beer pong table, staring up at the boy with deer eyes and the guy by his side.

“guys, that’s todd.”

the guy next to baby deer-boy - charlie - grinned. “yeah. we know.”

again, todd could feel the uncomfortable heat in his cheeks as he allowed a small “hi.” to escape his lips.

baby deer-boy smiled that cheeky smile again. shit he was beautiful. “i’m neil. that’s charlie. hey, are you okay? when you ran into me before i was worried you really had one too many.” he ran one hand through his brown hair, messing up his curls just the tiniest bit.

todd swallowed hard before managing a smile. “yeah, sorry about that. just wasn’t looking where i was going. sorry again.”

“hey, don’t worry. neily was just concerned you were running out to puke your guts out.” charlie looked a bit like a weasel with dark ginger hair, todd thought.

“alright!” knox exclaimed “are we playing or what? charlie, you’re with me.”

charlie frowned. “no fair, you can’t separate me from my baby!” and brought up a hand to ruffle through neil’s hair.

“yeah i can, come on.”

“i’ll never forget you, charlie!” neil fake-cried, dramatically holding onto charlie’s hand until they were standing next to knox at the other side of the table. “ready, todd?” he laughed.

todd sighed and chuckled. “as ready as i’ll ever be, i guess.”

neil and todd absolutely destroyed knox and charlie. neither of them were really great, but they were still far better than knox, who only hit one cup during the entire game. charlie was awesome, they scored almost every single time, but not even their incredible form and excellence could make up for knox’s... whatever it was. when they had won the second game in a row, todd high-fived neil who, in turn, pulled todd into an overwhelming hug.

“neil, no!” charlie fell to their knees, a dramatic look of betrayal on their face.

“sorry, babe,” neil chuckled “i’ve got a new beer pong partner now.” he looked at todd and winked seductively.

todd smiled and put his arm around neil’s shoulder, which wasn’t quite as easy as it seemed because of the considerable height difference between the two. “damn right, he does.”  
charlie, knox and neil erupted into laughter.

todd’s chest almost exploded.

the four boys left the party shortly after, three of them drunk (knox, todd, neil), three of them stoned (knox, charlie, neil), all of them high on adrenaline, laughing and yelling into the night. they started walking and only stopped when they reached a big park located on the college campus, at which point charlie grabbed onto knox’s hand, sitting down on a nearby bench and pulling the shorter boy onto them.

“i think that’s our cue” neil whispered to todd.

“by all means, you’re welcome to join!” charlie’s truly considerate offer earned them an eye roll from neil.

knox giggled quietly. “don’t do this to neil, you know it’s not his scene.”

“yep, we’re getting out of here.” with that, neil grabbed todd’s arm and started walking toward the building in which the freshman dorms were located, todd struggling to keep up with him (how are his legs so long?).

as the elevator started moving to take them up to the second floor of the four-story building (neil’s stop), neil turned to todd, an inquisitive look on his face. “what’s your dorm number?”

“32, i believe. why?”

“great. i’ll pick you up for brunch with the rest tomorrow. if you’re interested, that is.”

todd blinked, more than slightly overwhelmed by neil showing any interest in him. “uhm, sure, yeah, whatever.” in the elevator mirror he could see his cheeks turn the faintest shade of pink.

neil didn't seem to notice, however. “perfect. be there at 10.”

“sure, yeah.” todd repeated, before taking a deep breath in. “hey, what did knox mean when he said that was ‘not your scene’ back there?”

“that i’m straight.”

right as he said it, the elevator dinged and neil stepped out into the hallway, turning around for one last smile. “i’ll see you tomorrow.”  
the doors closed before todd could say anything else, leaving him alone as the elevator moved towards the third floor.

_straight._

_dammit._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> couple o things:  
> no i do not know proper punctuation  
> no i don't know shit about american college life so be gentle with me  
> yes i use the word "guy" in a genderneutral context  
> 


End file.
